If you relate, you are not alone. More and more children have similar concerns.

If your child opens up to you on this topic, it’s tempting (and human) to want to take the pain away and tell them how wrong they are. As parents, it is in our nature to want to protect our children. However, this practice can invalidate their feelings. As an alternative, try encouraging your child to talk more. Then, sit and listen; hug them; tell them how difficult it must be to feel this way. This will make them feel understood, safe and secure.

Don’t try to ‘fix the problem’ by suggesting changes in diet, exercise, or clothing. The real problem is how your child feels, not how they look. If someone comments on your child’s body, speak up! It may be awkward, but your child needs to see that you are standing up for them.

It would also be helpful to explore and work on your own weight bias: are you okay with your body? What about other peoples’ bodies? Weight bias can be subconscious, the result of early influences. Take extra care when talking about your body, avoid commenting on the appearance of others and implement a policy of body respect and body acceptance in your household.

Finally, remember: parenting is messy and hard. Don’t beat yourself up or start questioning your parenting skills. Your child’s difficulty is not your fault. But it is our responsibility, as parents and health professionals, to advocate for our children. As far as body image is concerned, we have gloriously failed as a society. But there is hope. So, let’s try to change the ‘perfect body’ mentality and stop shaming those who deviate from it.

If you need help to support your child with their relationship with food and their body, I am here to help.